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Ethical non-monogamy / CNM

Consensual non-monogamy (CNM) consists of consensual agreements between adults to engage in multiple romantic or sexual relationships.[1]

Sources: grade B×7, grade C×5. Last checked 8 October 2026. What the grades mean

Non-monogamy is an umbrella term for a relationship arrangement where one or more partners are not sexually and/or romantically exclusive to each other.[2] Monogamy and non-monogamy are not strictly binary. They sit on a continuum, from strictly monogamous relationships to openly non-exclusive arrangements, with many nuanced forms in between.[3]

Polyamory allows for ethical non-monogamy (ENM), which is a subset of the broader consensual non-monogamy.[4] Other terms exist too. Some people use "monogamish" for relationships that are primarily monogamous but allow some flexibility outside the primary partnership.[5] Terms such as primary and secondary give a rough sense of involvement, commitment or priority, but their exact meaning varies from speaker to speaker.[6]

CNM does not involve multiple legally recognised marriages.[1] Because existing legal frameworks typically do not accommodate multiple concurrent partnerships, CNM relationships are excluded from many legal protections, such as inheritance rights and hospital visitation.[1] Some places have taken steps towards recognition, such as Somerville, Massachusetts, which in June 2020 adopted an ordinance permitting domestic partnerships involving more than two adults.[7]

In Western cultures, monogamy is widely regarded as superior to relationships with multiple partners, a preference often called mononormativity.[8] Consensually non-monogamous people face widespread stigma and are often misunderstood because of stereotypes and myths.[8] A 2026 UK survey of several kink-related interest groups found that its participants were more likely to have non-monogamous identities.[9]

Sources

  1. Source grade BFüllgrabe, Doris; Smith, David S. (2023-10-01). " "Monogamy? In this Economy?": Stigma and Resilience in Consensual Non-Monogamous Relationships" . Sexuality & Culture . 27 (5): 1955– 1976. doi : 10.1007/s12119-023-10099-7 . ISSN 1936-4822 . doi.org; Emens, Elizabeth F. (2004). "Monogamy's Law: Compulsory Monogamy and Polyamorous Existence". SSRN 506242 . papers.ssrn.com; Scoats, Ryan; Campbell, Christine (December 2022). "What do we know about consensual non-monogamy?" . Current Opinion in Psychology . 48 101468. doi : 10.1016/j.copsyc.2022.101468 . PMID 36215906 . doi.org (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  2. Source grade BKelberga (Kelberg), Anna; Martinsone, Baiba (2022-09-21). "Motivation of non-monogamous adults to engage in sex with their different partners" . Frontiers in Psychology . 13 961949. doi : 10.3389/fpsyg.2022.961949 . ISSN 1664-1078 . PMC 9533024 . PMID 36211920 . ncbi.nlm.nih.gov (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  3. Source grade BFerrer, Jorge N. (2018-01-02). "Beyond the non/monogamy system: fluidity, hybridity, and transcendence in intimate relationships". Psychology & Sexuality . 9 (1): 3– 20. doi : 10.1080/19419899.2017.1400459 . ISSN 1941-9899 . doi.org; Parsons, Jeffrey T.; Starks, Tyrel J.; DuBois, Steve; Grov, Christian; Golub, Sarit A. (February 2013). "Alternatives to Monogamy Among Gay Male Couples in a Community Survey: Implications for Mental Health and Sexual Risk" . Archives of Sexual Behavior . 42 (2): 303– 312. doi : 10.1007/s10508-011-9885-3 . ISSN 0004-0002 . PMC 5830303 . PMID 22187028 . ncbi.nlm.nih.gov; Nelson, Tammy (2013). Redefining your relationship after infidelity: The new monogamy . Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications.; Le Cunff, Anne-Laure (2018). "Non-Monogamy: Measuring Degrees of Sexual and Romantic Exclusivity in Relationships". SSRN 3232078 . papers.ssrn.com (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  4. Source grade CKlesse, C. (2011). "Notions of love in polyamory: Elements in a discourse on multiple loving" . Laboratorium . 3 (2): 4– 25. Archived from the original on March 17, 2017 . Retrieved December 27, 2016 . soclabo.org (via Wikipedia: Polyamory)
  5. Source grade BMogilski, Justin; Rodrigues, David L.; Lehmiller, Justin J; Balzarini, Rhonda Nicole (2021-06-08). "Maintaining multi-partner relationships: Evolution, sexual ethics, and consensual non-monogamy" . PsyArXiv . doi : 10.31234/osf.io/k4r9e . hdl : 10071/31924 . Retrieved 2024-12-26 . doi.org; Barker, MEG-John; Richards, Christina (2015). "Gender in Counselling Psychology". Counselling Psychology - A textbook for study and practice . pp. 281– 296. doi : 10.1002/9781394259298.ch19 . ISBN 978-1-119-10685-2 . oro.open.ac.uk (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  6. Source grade CAggie (29 November 2012). "Riding the relationship escalator (or not)" . Retrieved 2016-09-16 . solopoly.net (via Wikipedia: Terminology of non-monogamy)
  7. Source grade Chlr (2022-03-10). "Three's Company, Too: The Emergence of Polyamorous Partnership" . Harvard Law Review . Retrieved 2024-12-23 . harvardlawreview.org (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  8. Source grade BScoats, Ryan; Campbell, Christine (December 2022). "What do we know about consensual non-monogamy?" . Current Opinion in Psychology . 48 101468. doi : 10.1016/j.copsyc.2022.101468 . PMID 36215906 . doi.org (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  9. Source grade BBrown A, Barker ED, Friedrich S, Rahman Q. A Survey of the United Kink-dom: Investigating Five Paraphilic Interest Groups and Their Demographic and Psychological Correlates. J Sex Res. 2026. doi:10.1080/00224499.2025.2486472
  10. Source grade CKršljanin, Nina (2023), "Adultery as a Crime in the Western World and Beyond: From a Man's Property to (In)Fidelity, from Discrimination to Decriminalization" , in Vujadinović, Dragica; Álvarez del Cuvillo, Antonio; Strand, Susanne (eds.), Feminist Approaches to Law , Gender Perspectives in Law, vol. 1, Cham: Springer International Publishing, pp. 129– 150, doi : 10.1007/978-3-031-14781-4_6 , ISBN link.springer.com (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  11. Source grade BBlow, Adrian J.; Hartnett, Kelley (April 2005). "Infidelity in Committed Relationships I: A Methodological Review". Journal of Marital and Family Therapy . 31 (2): 183– 216. doi : 10.1111/j.1752-0606.2005.tb01555.x . ISSN 0194-472X . PMID 15974058 . doi.org (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)
  12. Source grade CHosseini, Ziba Mir (2010). "Criminalizing Sexuality: Zina Laws as Violence Against Women in Muslim Contexts" (PDF) . documentation.lastradainternational.org (via Wikipedia: Non-monogamy)

Grades: A systematic review or official classification, B peer-reviewed study, C expert or community organisation, D practice from the community without research. How we grade sources.

Every claim was checked against its source before publication. Last checked 8 October 2026.