Submissive (sub)
In dominance and submission (D/s), the people who take the subordinate position are called submissive, or subs[1].
Sources: grade A×1, grade B×3, grade C×4, grade D×1. Last checked 8 October 2026. What the grades mean
In D/s, both parties take pleasure or erotic enjoyment from either dominating or being dominated[1]. Those in the superior position are called dominants, while a switch is an individual who can play either role[1]. Physical contact is not necessary, and D/s can be conducted by telephone, email or other messaging systems[1].
The term power exchange refers to the empowerment of the dominant by the submissive's surrender to their control[2]. This exchange is consensual, and one source describes the submissive as holding the underlying control[2]. The dominant is described as attempting to satisfy the submissive's kinks and desires[2].
Rules are usually set and agreed upon by a dominant and a submissive before any scene or situation begins[3]. Community guidance describes negotiated rules, protocols, safewords and regular check-ins as parts of a structured dominant/submissive dynamic[4]. Many submissives wear a collar to indicate their status and commitment, and some choose a more subdued symbolic collar such as a bracelet or ankle chain[5].
The terms top and bottom can be used as synonyms for dominant and submissive, though they focus on the physical play[6]. In a 2026 UK survey, men were more likely to take dominant roles, women submissive roles, and nonbinary people to switch roles[7].
Sources
- Source grade BFedoroff, Paul J. (2008). "Sadism, Sadomasochism, Sex, and Violence" . Canadian Journal of Psychiatry . 53 (10): 637– 646. doi : 10.1177/070674370805301003 . PMID 18940032 . :"Sexual arousal from consensual interactions that include domination should be distinguished from non consensual sex acts." doi.org
- Source grade DBauer, Robin (2014). Queer BDSM intimacies: Critical consent and pushing boundaries . Houndmills, Basingstoke, Hampshire; New York, NY: Palgrave Macmillan. {{ cite book }} : CS1 maint: location missing publisher ( link )
- Source grade ABrown, Ashley; Barker, Edward D.; Rahman, Qazi (2020). "A Systematic Scoping Review of the Prevalence, Etiological, Psychological, and Interpersonal Factors Associated with BDSM". The Journal of Sex Research . 57 (6): 781– 811. doi : 10.1080/00224499.2019.1665619 . doi.org
- Source grade CBeMoreKinky (2025-01-24). "Submissive Training Guide: Creating BDSM Slave Rules" . BeMoreKinky . Retrieved 11 March 2026 . bemorekinky.com
- Source grade CMakai, Michael (September 2013). "Chapter 6: The Collar". Domination & Submission: The BDSM Relationship Handbook . Createspace. pp. 152– 161. ISBN 978-1492775973 .
- Source grade CNewmahr, Staci (2011). Playing on the Edge: Sadomasochism, Risk, and Intimacy . Indiana University Press. ISBN 9780253355973 . OCLC 802887067 . search.worldcat.org
- Source grade BBrown A, Barker ED, Friedrich S, Rahman Q. A Survey of the United Kink-dom: Investigating Five Paraphilic Interest Groups and Their Demographic and Psychological Correlates. J Sex Res. 2026;63(3):412-430. doi:10.1080/00224499.2025.2486472
- Source grade C"DSM, DSM-Iv, DSM-Ivr", Encyclopedia of Pain , Springer Berlin Heidelberg, 2013, p. 1080, doi : 10.1007/978-3-642-28753-4_100651 , ISBN 9783642287527 doi.org
- Source grade BDunkley, Cara R.; Brotto, Lori A. (22 April 2019). "The Role of Consent in the Context of BDSM". Sexual Abuse . 32 (6). doi : 10.1177/1079063219842847 . ISSN 1079-0632 . PMID 31010393 . S2CID 128359900 . doi.org
Every claim was checked against its source before publication. Last checked 8 October 2026.